The often mindless (and certainly meaningless) preseason is in full swing, and opening day is just a week away.
Are you looking for a team to replace your suddenly terrible squad? (We’re looking at you, Bills and Bengals fans.) Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered.
Watch with trepidation: The Browns
OK, bear with me now. The Browns, on paper at least, should be an interesting team to watch this year. Sure, they’ve only won one regular-season game in the past two years, but they had two picks in the top five of the draft this season. No one could possibly botch that, right? Heisman winner Baker Mayfield is exciting, even if he isn’t the starter (sad trombone). Plus, have you been watching Hard Knocks? The chaos of this organization is truly breathtaking to behold. Win or lose, these Browns will certainly be a spectacle this year.
Watch with hope: The Chargers
Sure, they moved from San Diego to L.A. and apparently their fan base isn’t super interested in commuting north through an Marine base every Sunday. But the Chargers are actually pretty good. Of all the teams that missed the playoffs last year, the Chargers were, by a very wide margin, the best. Philip Rivers was the NFL’s second-leading passer, and the Chargers were third overall in total offense despite missing the postseason. Some awful luck and a bad (like, crazy bad) kicker early in the season kept them from advancing, but they should be among the favorites in the AFC West this year. Even if they’re still the second-best team in the Los Angeles Metro Area.
Watch with us: The Bears
No surprise here, but we’ve got a good feeling about the Bears this season. Mitchell Trubisky looks like he might be the real deal. Speaking of deals, Roquan Smith might be the next Dick Butkus, if we ever get him signed and see him on the field. Either way, you can bet we’ll be watching every Sunday with a foam finger on one hand and a big bowl of Chi-Town Chow Down in the other.